Hypothetical question: What would you do if a lioness looked like she was trying to eat a toddler at the zoo?

This is Haruno Sakura, reporting back after finishing the first round of paperwork from docking the Loki. A full mission report will be on file for anyone wanting to read through in the next few days, just let me know if you're interested. Minato-san's already made the list of disappearances and Martel's striking out on her own public, so there's ( Read more... )

Is it working?

[ With some static feedback and crackling over the FF network, some familiar if absent faces manifest on the Guide. Hey everyone! There's upwards 30 people you might recognize shifting together in the general eye of the camera. ]

Come in S. S. Thor. This is [ bzzt ] Loki, reporting from [ bzzt ] sector. We've just recently ( Read more... )

Short notice, but I've just gotten a go ahead from the channels through the Thorian Pilot's Association that grants me access to one of the long-distance cruisers for an extended period of time. It can run on as few as seven people in crew, but hold up to thirty pending folks don't mind closer quarters. There's a few contracts attached, as in ( Read more... )

If any one of you visits the S. S. Sif and decides to challenge the "One shot to live" statement, consider any and all complaints about medical measures taken to preserve your life summarily ignored for being stupid enough to taking a general rule as a suggestion. Especially for those of you with human-type or grade internal filtering systems ( Read more... )

[ A pink panther sits on a generic bed, tail lashing, staring down the Guide which has been recording while the panther hiked itself away from the Guide and up onto the bed. ]

This is ridiculous.

--ome on come on tell me this one works -- ha! It's blinking! It's blinking!

[ Sakura the cheagle is being lit up by the glow from the guide she's located. She's covered in filth. Don't ask what. She doesn't know, and she doesn't want to find out. ]

Can someone please help get me out of here?!

[ Ending on a high note, she -- he -- sounds ( Read more... )

[The guide feed is suddenly assaulted by this lovely and ... quite frankly baffling image for a few seconds before it turns to black and the audio feed picks up.]

Sooo, how many o' them pictures did ya wanna?

[there's a pause where all you can hear is the sound of the vent blowing wind loudly up Sasuke's skirt before TWO NINJAS REPLY IN CHORUS, ( Read more... )

[ Sakura stands on this platform, dressed in coveralls. Blue coveralls, with a red long sleeved shirt on. She adjusts her white gloves, then pulls down her baseball cap emblazoned with a giant "S." ]

Time to save the princess.

[ And armed with a plunger, off she goes. ]

( the guide says that swimsuit models and car wax are too racy for the public. VIEWER DISCRETION IS ADVISED. )